Q: My 2-month-old cries
hysterically when I dress and undress him. It makes me feel awful, but
what can I do?
A: Don't feel bad—many babies
protest at being changed. Going from feeling warm and cozy to being exposed can
be very uncomfortable. Imagine what the womb must have felt like to him: warm
and protected, soft and comfy. Your baby still prefers feeling like that now
that he's out in the world. It's no wonder he loves being in a warm onesie and
swaddled in a blanket. When he finds himself naked and chilly on the changing
table, he lets you know he doesn't like it one bit the only way he knows how:
by crying.
Certain factors make changing especially distressing for young babies. One is
that infants aren't able to regulate their body temperature very well. When
they're undressed, the temperature drop feels dramatic, and it takes them
longer to warm up once they're clothed again.
Also, when you change your baby, all different parts of his body are being
pushed and tugged as clothing is pulled over his head and up and down his arms
and legs. For infants who are very sensitive to touch, the experience can be
particularly uncomfortable. They show it by pulling away, arching their backs,
and crying.
Be sure to plan ahead and make dressing as gentle and quick as possible. Have a
clean diaper, baby wipes, and your child's change of clothes close at hand.
Consider using warm diaper wipes (you can buy a wipes warmer), or moisten paper
towels or a washcloth with warm water. When changing your child, drape a soft
towel or blanket over his body to keep him warm. Or avoid getting him naked all
at once: Take off the bottom part of his onesie and change his diaper while he
still has the top part on. You can also try distracting him with a mobile above
the changing table or by singing and talking to him while you undress him.
The most important thing you can do, however, is stay calm. When you get upset,
your baby senses it in your facial expressions, your voice, and in the way you
touch him as you perhaps rush to get the process over with sooner—and that will
just get him more worked up. So take a deep breath, and remember, the crying is
not about you. Reassure your baby by saying, "I understand you don't like
this, sweetie. I'll just be a few more seconds. I'm putting your pajamas on
now." Even though he doesn't understand your words yet, your soft, loving
tone will send the right message.
A version of this question first appeared in "Your Child's Behavior," a column written by ZERO TO THREE in American Baby magazine.







