Kimberly, Hawaii

Respect Changes Everything

My experience navigating child welfare showed me how quickly parents can lose their footing when systems move faster than relationships.

From the outside, things may look organized and efficient. From the inside, it can feel confusing, overwhelming, and isolating, especially when parents aren’t fully included in conversations about their own families.

What I learned is that how early childhood systems show up matters just as much as they do.

It felt like decisions were happening before I understood what was even being asked of me.

Kimberly

When Systems Move Faster Than Families

One of the hardest parts for me was the pace. Information came quickly, often in language I wasn’t familiar with. Expectations were set but not always explained. And when parents don’t fully understand what’s happening, it’s easy to feel like you’re already behind.

I knew my child. I knew my situation. But it didn’t always feel like there was space for that knowledge to slow things down or shape the plan.

That disconnect doesn’t mean parents don’t care. It means they’re trying to catch up while under stress.

When someone actually slowed down and explained things, I could show up differently.

Kimberly

Collaboration Builds Trust

What shifted things for me was a change in approach.

When someone took the time to explain what was happening, asked how I was doing, and truly listened without judgment, I felt less defensive, less anxious, and more able to participate. Listening didn’t just help me feel better—it made the process work better.

Parent voice isn’t symbolic—it’s practical. Now, as a Parent Leader with Safe Babies, working alongside parents and families, I see firsthand how parents know what’s realistic for their lives. When plans are made without that input, challenges grow—not from lack of effort, but because the plan never fit to begin with.

Early, consistent engagement leads to better outcomes. The most supportive moments were collaborative—when I was treated as a partner, not managed.

Clear communication, checking for understanding, and shared decision-making build trust. And trust changes everything—how parents engage, respond, and move forward.

I realized my experience could help improve how things are done. I want parents to feel respected from the very beginning.

Kimberly

From Experience to Leadership

I didn’t step into parent leadership because I had all the answers. I stepped into it because I saw patterns, places where systems unintentionally created barriers instead of bridges.

Sharing lived experience isn’t about reliving the hardest moments. It’s about using what you’ve learned to help shape better pathways for families coming after you.

My why is grounded in respect. When parents feel respected, they engage more fully. When they engage more fully, children benefit. And when systems prioritize partnership over assumptions, outcomes improve: not just for one family, but across the system.

Listening matters. Clarity matters. Respect matters. And when parents are treated as capable, informed participants, families are stronger for it.

Kimberly currently serves as a Parent Leader with Safe Babies, a Program of ZERO TO THREE™.

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