If You Only Knew: A Tool for Grandparent Caregivers

One out of four preschool children is cared for by a grandparent while his parents work or go to school. There are many benefits when grandparents care for young children, but when more than one generation is involved in child care, communication can be a challenge. Even when relationships are warm, sharing the care can stir up strong feelings. Parents may worry that their child prefers to be with their grandparent, rather than with them. Parents may also worry that grandparents are better at parenting than they are. Grandparents may struggle to establish good boundaries. And, of course, conflicts may arise over child-rearing approaches.

Uses and Goals of this Tool

1. To provide a way to think about the topic of “sharing the care” across generations and provide guidance for dialogue about the shared tasks of caregiving.
2. To offer guidance and relief for families’ conflicts.
3. To help grandparents and their adult children share what they appreciate about each other.
4. To offer caregiving adults the chance to share struggles and worries about their roles and the children in their care.

Download the full If You Only Knew tool to get the conversation started.